Sour party mix dresses for dinner and buys garlic

Last day of preparation, day three at home involved....a trip out.
To school to pick up art supplies left behind, to Bin Inn for preserving sugar and randoms, more art supplies, then cueing one by one in the sunshine for forty five minutes to get Grandad's butcher order. The butcher in the village is closing which was a surprise so we had one day to calmly stock. Two cottage pies and a kilo of sausages should keep him going for weeks. Four square for, not a panic shop as much as a comfort one. Ice cream, chocolate (including chili flavor to put off the kids), lollies labelled sour party mix, more lollies - jet planes this time  - because I'sa feeling nostalgic, garlic (still checking vampire horizon) and fresh pasta. Weird. Gingernuts. Back to school to pick up tennis gear left behind. All the usual Grrrrr noises. All the kids went out to play tennis with their Dad and I thought wow this is what an empty house feels like.
Tried to work.
Cold water therapy sea swim after trying to work.
Gave the buoy a big hug and felt a millions times better. FYI I bags all the buoy hugs this month.
Cooked nice dinner.
Dressed for dinner and Texas hold 'em poker.
Zoom called the siblings and parents.
Five minutes staring at fucking Notre dame in pieces. Put one piece back together.
I feel like Humpty Dumpty put back together with all the wrong pieces pointing the wrong way. My nose is in my armpit. I don't know what to say or what to expect.The sour party mix was supposed to be ironic funny and the dressing for poker night meant to convey an air of siege mentality throw your last breeding dodo into the fire pit, chaps. we are all having so much jolly fun. Here we go, doing it for all the right reasons. But then I blew it by yelling at my bubble mates because they are well, really annoying and I am really annoyed. (Clarification :They are annoying only some times and I am annoyed all the time). Party on, friends. For the health of others, I know.
Jacinda says I cant invite you to my sour party (mix) but my fear is would you even want to come?